He Never Knows
by angel514
Summary: "He never knows how much I wait for this day to come just to see him again. He never knows that I'm in love with him, badly. Natsume Hyuuga will never know" That's what SHE thought until HE read HER diary. (NxM) (ONE-SHOT)


Disclaimer: Gakuen Alice in not mine and will never be.

* * *

**HE NEVER KNOWS**

He never knows how much I wait for this day to come just to see him again.

He never knows that every Christmas I pretty myself just for him.

He never knows I always think of him always.

He never knows I once dreamt of us getting married in the church.

He never knows I often imagine that we walk together holding hands in the park.

He never knows I tell my friends about him.

He never knows that I love music just like him.

He never knows that I stare at the pictures he takes with his DSLR camera.

He never knows I actually saved my money just to buy one of his paintings.

He never knows his my ideal guy.

He never knows I use his family name after mine.

He never knows I really like him calling me polka-dots, it makes me feel special.

He never knows how happy I when he says my name, my real name.

He never knows I fell for him the first time he stepped in our house.

He never knows that I'm in love with him, badly.

Natsume Hyuuga will never know.

- Mikan ^^

December 25, 2010

01:34 am

* * *

As she closed her diary, a smile filled with satisfaction was written all over her face. She placed it under her pillow ready to think or perhaps dream about the crimson-eyed guy she has been fancying.

Tomorrow, her cousin, Ruka was coming for the annual Christmas lunch at their house. What she was really excited about is his cousin's bestfriend, Natsume Hyuuga, who was always tagging along with him. It has been that way for five years. Ruka's parents were in France and Natsume's were always busy handling their company's affairs especially because it's Christmas season.

She wants to be the first person to welcome them since they'll arrive early in the morning, around 5 am. Though Phineas and Ferb was on the TV, she lied down comfortably in their sofa, smiling like an idiot, thinking of no one but him.

* * *

"Mikan"

"Give me 5 more minutes, mom"

"Mikan, wake up"

The auburn haired protagonist opened one of her to see her mother wearing her usual cooking attire. She now moved so that her back was on her mom and she now faced the clock.

_8:40._

"Mom, wake me up at 8:45." She pleaded shutting her eyes again and waiting to go back to her slumber.

"Okay" her mother said but just before she went out of her room she informed "I was just going to tell you Ruka's here."

"What!" The brunette shouted quickly sitting up and fully awake. "Is he – a- alone?" she ask slowly with '_Please say Natsume is here too,' _running in her thoughts.

"He's with Natsume as usual." '_YES' _She thought, her inner self probably jumping up and down.

"That's nice mom! I'll be down in a jiffy!" she said to her mother as she hurriedly grabbed her towel and headed towards the bathroom. _"_By the way, why am I in my room?" she asked.

"Oh, Tsubasa saw you in the sleeping in the living room this morning and decided to carry you here," her mom replied as she left her room.

'_What a brother! Damn!' _She cursed slamming her bathroom door, planning different ways on how to kill her brother.

* * *

She was busy all morning, helping her mom cook and entertaining guests who entered into their house. It was Christmas tradition that the Sakura's, Yukihira's and Nogi's spend at least lunch together. Even if all weren't complete, as long as a representative of that family is their, it's not a problem.

Though she was that busy, she always notices him. He was sitting in the sofa, reading. The guy in our brunette's dreams seems to be enjoying that literary piece of work since he would see him smiling.

_Natsume Hyuuga doesn't smile often, he smirks, not smile._

And she thought she was so lucky to be one of the few to capture this moment.

_I must get a copy of that manga._

She decided as she went back to whatever she's working on.

It was after lunch that she got to chat with him.

"Hey," she said as she sat down on the sofa beside Ruka.

"Mimi," Ruka said as she ruffled her hair and cleared his throat "I'll be leaving you to now, since I need to make a call."

Her eyes trailed at his cousin who just cousin left off not noticing the glare Natsume was sending him. There was a pause, an awkward silence between the two of them.

"So-"

"How-"

"I mean-"

"Are-"

Yes, both parties seemed not to have a decent conversation after a minute.

She giggled while he chuckled. Quickly she insisted that he go first.

"So, how are you polka-dots?"

She glared at him remembering the first time they met when she was showing off her parents around the polka-dotted swimsuit her mother gave her that Christmas. She didn't know Ruka would earlier than anticipated and she wasn't expecting him to have company. So after the doorbell rang and she opened it, she slammed it to them running directly to her room.

"Don't call me that, I was trying to forget that ever happened," she said punching him by the arm.

"But that was really funny though, when you opened the door, you practically slammed it after you saw us." He smirked at her and all she could do was stuck out her tongue.

"Enough with the childish spat the two of you," Ruka entered as he sat beside Mikan who was now between both guys.

"So how's college life?" She asked the both of them. She knew they were both juniors at Alice University in Tokyo. Ruka is studying a Pre-Veterinary course while Natsume's course is Fine Arts.

"Great," Natsume replied and she rolled eyes.

"Here comes the one-line answers," she whispered to Ruka knowing the other party definitely heard her too and the blond just smiled.

"Okay, it's a bit stressful with all the deadlines and stuffs but anyways its fun to learn new things and have freedom in your life." Natsume explained. "There, satisfied?"

She nodded and looked at Ruka. "Your turn, Ruka-pyon."

"Yeh, Lot's of interesting things to learn about, more hectic schedule though I'm glad that there's no more random girls trying to get me," he told his cousin.

"Lucky you," his best friend commented earning a curios glance from Mikan.

"You mean, no more Natsume-Ruka Fan Club?" she sniggered as she used the term.

"It changed to Natsume Fan Club," the blonde boy said pointing his best friend.

"Well, it's because your girlfriend is creepy," Natsume said back while Mikan froze in shock.

"You have a girlfriend and you didn't tell me?" she said lecturing Ruka about an inexistent law that states first cousins should tell about their love lives to their fellow cousins and should not keep a secret.

"You shouldn't have told her that," Ruka glanced at his best friend. "You're jealous." He then accused him.

"Am not"

"Are too"

"I'm not jealous."

"Yes, you are. You are jealous; I have a loving girlfriend-"

"Yeah, a loving girlfriend who takes pictures of you for blackmail purposes and who lets you pay for the entire bill at that expensive restaurant. I'm totally jealous." He cut him off.

"Hotaru is a unique person, who shows a different way of affection."

"A creepy way of affection would be a much more appropriate description."

"You're doing this because you're still single and have no guts to ask the girl you like out!" Ruka rebutted earning a deadly glare from Natsume and a raised brow from Mikan.

Her breath stopped and her heart was in pain too.

_Natsume wants to ask the girl he likes out_. _And he didn't ask me out. Therefore Natsume doesn't like me._

She quickly concluded making her feel bad.

"Let's change the topic," Ruka suggested as the others nodded in agreement. "So Mimi, your graduating soon, what would you like to take up?"

Removing the ugly conclusion she made up, she answered the question "I think something Computer Science or Engineering perhaps at Alice U. I'm taking the entrance test next month."

"Surely you can do it." Natsume said and the bad feeling was suddenly gone. _He's cheering me._

"Of course, you're the top of your class!" Ruka added.

"MIKAN!" she was interrupted by some loud annoying voice coming from upstairs as she was about to thank them. "HELP ME! THERE'S A PROBLEM WITH MY COMPUTER AND MISAKI IS ONLINE."

"Ugh, I gotta go. Tsubasa-nii has these so called 'problems' again," she said waving them both goodbye. She looked back at the two noticing Ruka and Natsume silently arguing again.

* * *

She wasn't able to talk to Natsume again considering her friends stopped by too and they spent a few hours in her room, exchanging gifts, gossip here and there and a bit of teasing her especially when they passed by Natsume, who was reading again, as they left the house.

It was already 6:40 pm, she never thought time would pass so quickly.

"Mimi"

"Yes, Ruka-pyon?"

"Do you have a pen?"

"Yup, why?"

"Natsume wants to borrow"

"Kay, wait a minute."

She gave him the pen and wondered what Natsume was going to do with it. She peeked as Ruka gave him the pen and saw him writing on what he was reading for almost the whole day.

Dinner wasn't noisy like the Christmas lunch. Only her parents, Tsubasa, Ruka, Natsume and her were enjoying it.

She took glances at Natsume while she was eating. Desperate to memorize again his amazing features, they were leaving at about nine since their flight is on midnight and they need to check-in early.

She sighed happily as he was enjoying the pasta she cooked awhile ago. She knew it was his favorite.

She took a glance again, and suddenly their eyes met.

He smiled; okay it was more like 'smirked.'

And she looked down and continued to eat replaying the scene awhile ago in her mind again and again.

_He must not know I have a huge CRUSH on him!_

* * *

It was almost nine and time to bid goodbye to Ruka and Natsume.

"Bye Ruka-pyon!" Mikan said as she hugged tightly her favorite cousin.

"Bye Mimi, I'll miss you!"

"Bye Natsume"

"Aren't you going to hug him too?" The blonde joked as he placed his bag at backseat of the taxi.

"Merry Christmas to the both of you!" she slapped Ruka's back as he entered the taxi. "Bye Natsume" she said and she hugged him too.

"Bye polka-dots," he replied squeezing her tight. "By the way … He already knows." He whispered to her.

Blink … _who's he_

Blink Blink … _what does he know?_

Blink …

Oh

My

Gosh!

_He was reading my diary?_

Her face was pained with shock as the taxi drive away and the last thing she saw was Natsume with a smirk plastered in his face.

"My life is ruined!" the brunette murmured as she got her diary under the pillow and went up to her room. She buried herself in her sheets trying to cry herself to sleep or die of embarrassment.

But suddenly Mikan remembered the pen.

_What was that for?_

She sat up and scanned her diary to her latest entry.

And read what he has written.

* * *

Then someone knocked at her door.

"Mikan?"

"Yes dad?"

"It seems Ruka and Natsume's flight has been cancelled, do you want to come with me to the airport to fetch them back?"

"Sure dad!" the brunette shouted enthusiastically leaving the diary in her bed.

_Thank you, Kami-sama._ She thought.

* * *

And now she knows he likes her back.

-NH

December 25, 2010 - 7:12 pm

* * *

:)

Revised: 4/23/2013 – 1:16 AM

I sort of like this story, so I want to improve it a bit. Did you like it? Do you want Natsume's side for this one?

Hope you could do me a favor and suggest some improvements or comments or point out some errors :)

In short: **REVIEW** please~


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